These past two years have been the worst and most humbling of my life. I’ve never had to fight so hard or been so weak. There have been moments of bliss and even hope. It’s mostly surrounded by darkness and pain. I’m more scared now than ever before. Being a bit more clear mentally has truly let me assess my …

Please excuse the couple day delay. I started feeling better and got hyper focused on trying to get things done. I had two days that were purty great! Yesterday and today not as much but that’s to be expected I guess. Well let’s jump right in and see where this goes… Medication changes have slowed but are still happening. As …

Well we’ve made it to another weekend and I actually know what day it is! Yesterday wasn’t such a good day but today has started off much better. I wasn’t feeling too hot most of the day yesterday. I ended up crashing many times, needing frequent naps. Wasn’t feeling well, in a lot of pain and the tremors were terrible. …

Alright back for another installment. Is anybody still reading this crap lol? I’ve got some good, some bad and no ugly unless you count me. Well enough of the bad jokes lets jump on in… Yesterday was a very long day. I had to talk to the doctors in the AM. That took up a couple hours. Then I had …

I want to start by apologizing that life got in the way and I couldn’t get a blog out yesterday. Heck I’m barely getting this one out. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so bad physically since the beginning. My mind can only think about my physical problems, pain and my dog being sick. Needless to say things aren’t optimal …

One day off and back so here I am! As for how many still read the crap I write makes me wonder lol. I guess this is for me as much as it is for you. I debate if this is a good use of the little energy and ability I have with my hands currently. I do sometimes wonder …

Well it’s already been an eventful morning. Woke up to crazy wind and rain. Then it got clear so Dart and I took a quick damp walk. Then it started to snow insanely hard. Now 30 min later it sounds like wind and rain again… WTF IS GOING ON! So as I said we took our morning walk. The weather …

Even though I felt like total crap yesterday, I pushed through and finally got a little accomplished. Not feeling any better, possibly worse today but have a busy day so it’s going to be another hard push. We can start with yesterday. After the blog I had several rest periods but managed to get a few things done. Did a …

Today might be a little boring but I’ve been doing such a good job at posting I didn’t want to let myself slip. Not that any of my previous blogs were nail bitters. Might as well jump right in. After some small corrections in what medications I was taking at what times, I’ve managed to help myself feel better. That …

Well here we are one more day into a blur. Yesterday was about the worst day I’ve had. Things got so bad by last night I knew I made a mistake. I tried to reduce my dosage too fast and it bit me in the rear. That’s what I get for thinking I know anything after two years of seriously …

My second day off all the “bad” medications! I feel like a hot pile of garbage but I’m free of at least two chemical prisons. That alone makes me feel so much better. It makes all this pain and suffering worth it. Now my body can finish detoxing and start to heal. Sure I may have to try another medication …

Ok so I’m going to admit I feel very unmotivated to write but I’m pushing through. It’s not that I feel any worse today. I honestly don’t know what it is. We’re here and going so let’s jump on in and see where it takes us… Yesterday did not go as planned. I did get some stuff accomplished and overall …

Three days in a row! Although today I’m pushing hard to get this out. Wanted to get it done before I failed. This is a significant accomplishment for me. I’ve never thought I’d make it near this far. I’m happy that I have. I hope at one point I’ll be telling you all positive things. Today just isn’t that day …

So here we are two days in a row! I figured I better push this out now before the day gets the better of me. So let’s jump right into it… Yesterday was a crap show. I got up like normal, took my walk with Dart after feeding him breakfast and taking my medication. After that I wrote the blog …

Wow! I know these blog posts are coming slow these days still… I do apologize. Coming off a medication or withdrawal I’ve found can be worse than starting it. Life has been a crazy roller coaster of everything. I think today we’re just going to wing and and see what we can get out of these hands. Let’s jump right …

I know I haven’t been posting much lately. That’s because I haven’t been doing much lately. The last couple months have been a hellscape of medications not working and unfortunately my body, mind and energy have taken a hard hit. I’m sure it doesn’t come as a surprise that I see a therapist. We all have to talk stuff out …

I know I’ve been slow to update and I apologize for that. I’ve not been feeling very well physically or mentally. The past three weeks have been an extreme struggle and the difficulties don’t seem to be getting any easier but I’m forcing myself to power through it… I think the primary cause is my medication. We made a change …

Another day of not feeling well but I wanted to get a blog post done. I need to keep moving forward and trying to get at least a couple things accomplished during the day no matter how I feel. We can start here… The meds still aren’t right or still aren’t working right, one of the two. I feel horrible. …

Life is just not very good right now… it’s not all bad but it seems that way. Family problems, financial problems, no security what so ever and things just keep going wrong one after another. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t know where to turn or who to talk to, I just want to lay down …

Oh boy it’s been many days. Firstly I want to apologize. I just needed some time to myself. I needed to process what’s going on with my family. I also needed some days to get the shed and rv cleaned up. I got to a good point and realized dang… I need to write a blog post so here we …

I know I’ve not been posting much so I figured it was time for a blog post… Firstly I would like to thank all of you for the love and support on my two very vague negative comments. Our family is going through a hard time right now. I’m doing ok but am for sure struggling. The meds they have …

Oh my oh my… Where to start. Things have been just crazy. I feel like life is really beating me up, then giving me a carrot and then beating me some more. Insanity, frustration and sadness at it’s finest. This should be a decently entertaining one?… Let’s start with meds. Yep those are all f-d up. So to recap. I …

I do apologize that it’s been a few days since my last update. I’ve got plenty to tell! Some good, some not so good. So let’s just jump right into it… First I’ll tell you about the last couple days. I GOT OUT OF THE RV FOR TWO DAY! That did a lot for me in a couple ways. I …

I often don’t read what I write in previous posts. I plan on going back and reading them some day. But I didn’t read my last post. I’m sure it was a shyt show. Well let’s not focus on the past, moving forward… So I called contacted both my Neurologist and my medication specialist firs thing. I was told to …

I know this was a long gap between posts. I hope someone still finds interest in these ramblings. Things have been good and not so good. I guess we’ll just jump right into it… So we’ll start with meds, health, life in general. The new meds might be working?!? Kind of hard to tell. I’m having major issues with memory …

Well I took an extra few days off. I was adding a medication and the holidays of course. It was nice having a few days to reboot and getting out of the RV a bit. I’ve had a full but very fun few days. So let’s get into it. First and foremost I had the appointment with the medication specialist. …

Happy Holidays! Just a few days until Christmas! I hope you all get everything you want and more! Well… let’s get on with it! The support and donations are again wonderful and overwhelming. It’s warmed my heart and made the past few days more happy than not. I apologize that I’ve been absent a bit. My little guy (dog) Dart …

Well if you’ve read any of my posts on Facebook, you’ll know where this ones going… DENIED! for a second time (the appeal phase) for SSI (disability). I’m now getting close to two years of waiting. With no possibility of employment. Which means no income… I want the best for me, but from an employer standpoint I’m a HUGE liability. …

I’m going to try to get back to daily or bi-daily blogs. I know I’ve been slacking a bit. There’s no good excuse but like today I feel terrible. I work up hurting extra bad and a bit confused. After getting my mind together, I realized I must have slept wrong. My right side is killing me right now. My …

First off, I’ll start with an apology. I think it’s been 5 days since my last post. So there is no good excuse but I have a few… but good thing at the end! The main issue is I’ve been feeling a little lost and depressed. The holidays always do this to me. I miss my sweet beautiful mom. It …